Did you ever had the feeling that you wanted to go/Still have the feeling that you wanted to stay…/
That's from an old Jimmy Durante's song that explains perfectly well how I felt about SL, when I first logged in and became an overwhelmed cyber-challenged Newbie.
I was never hooked on video games, my mind had already been captured by the tales and the myths books and movies told.
So, what was keeping me?
It didn't take long to discover that some of those tales and myths that had molded my mind had found their way into this virtual life, and had brought their magic along.
Please, bear with me.
First: you are provided with an avatar. It takes a while to have it look the way you want… but when that happens, you have the perfect mask. And behind the mask: the Phantom hides. Unless we are relentless narcissists, most of us always feel we have to hide our real selves to the world.
So we start secretly enjoying that. We have an avatar that whispers in our ears:
"Open up your mind/let your fantasies unwind/you know you cannot fight/the darkness of the music of the night."
Start to go/
Change your mind/
Here you discover that if we wish to remain looking the same… for ever… (let's not forget most people in SL choose to look young and lovely), then your avatar becomes Dorian's Gray.
And it's us, in RL, who become the avi's portraits, and grow old and wither instead of them.
It's tough you had the feelin that you wanted to go/
Still have the feeling that you wanted to stay/
So you run around as the Phantom that has become beautiful and immune to time and start prancing from sim to sim until you come across the Rabbit, who without asking your permission teleports you through his rabbit hole. And we edit and click to be able to get into the beautiful garden, because we realize we will finally have a real chance to get invited by the dangerous Queen Of Hearts to play croquet.
It's tough to have the feeling that you wanted to go/
Still have the feeling that you wanted to stay/
And then is when you realize you are in Neverland.
You finally flew to that island where we all get to be children again, and we choose to be Peter Pan, or Captain Hook, or the Lost Kids, untill Wendy talks us into our senses and makes us turn off our computers.
We had enough for this day.
Did you ever had the feeling that you wanted to go/
Still have the feeling that you wanted to stay?"
Next time you are in doubt, look at the SL midnight sky. You'll see your shadow fly pass across the pixel moon.
Next time you log out…do it slowly. And like the Cheshire Cat, your grin will remain.
Covadonga Writer
